Words shape our childhood and lives. Whether spoken or unspoken, the power of words can build or destroy everyone. In this episode, Ien Chi, a TEDx speaker, shares his perspective on using the weight of your words. He recollects his experiences and draws on how direct feedback impacts your relationship with others. He emphasized how words determine who we see in the mirror. Today, tune in and contemplate how heavy the words spoken to you are. How heavy are the words you speak?
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The Power Of Words: How Heavy Are The Words You Speak? With Ien Chi
Welcome back. I just want to thank all of my audience for doing what you do. You know what you do, you check in with us, you tune in, and we love your support. Thank you. Your support is priceless, and I am so grateful. Believe me, I don’t take it lightly because our time, we’re always running out of time or too busy. The time that you take out to be with us is really important to us and it’s priceless. We are discussing a new topic, you know my guest is the third person that I brought on that will dive into this topic with us. You remember, instead of doing a variety of topics with a variety of guests, we actually do something different.
We actually have one topic or a topic for a series, and our series is either 6 to 8 weeks, depending on how you guys respond to the topic that we’re talking about for the series. Instead of a variety of topics, we invite a diversity of guests to come in and they all talk about the same topic, which is good. We do this because we want to get different perspectives on the topic because we have a diverse audience.
With that being said, let’s dive in. When it comes to strangers, people you don’t know, people you walk past or see, when you’re out and about, these are first-time acquaintances. People may have stopped you asked a question or asked for directions. These are people that we do not know. What do you say to them?
When it comes to our family members, more intimate relationships that are in our lives, like our loved ones, those people that you consider your best friend, they’re in your inner circle, what do you say to them? Do you want your words? Here’s why. Words are very powerful. Our discussion is about how powerful words are and how do you use your words. That’s what we’re talking about.
Words are so powerful. We know that the more intimate the relationship, the heavier words can become, and the greater their capacity to wound, hurt, leave a mark, or scar. Even words left unsaid have the capacity to hurt. Unsaid phrases have the potential to impact the trajectory of a person’s life. I’ve witnessed this on numerous occasions where a youth, a young adult, a college student, a parent, a single adult, or parents with children have been in tears because of a phrase they never heard their father say.
A phrase or a statement they had never heard their mother say. Words that they would have given anything to hear, such as, “I love you. I’m proud of you. What a great job. I appreciate you.” Words such as, “Thank you, I’m sorry. Please forgive me.” In fact, unspoken words have just as much impact as spoken words on our lives. Here’s my point, words are powerful, and words carry weight, which leads to me asking this question, how heavy are your words?
I’m not done yet. Here’s some support for my study on this topic. You know I’m a Jesus follower, so of course, I’m going to use the word words from the Bible that’s going to support my statement. Ephesians 4:29 says, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouth, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who tune in.”
Proverbs 18:21 says, “Life and death is in the power of the tongue.” This thing is right here. James 1:19 says, “Remember this, my dear brothers and sisters, everyone should be quick to listen and slow to speak, and should not get angry easily. A little bit more about the tongue. It’s an unruly evil, full of deadly poison.”
James 3:7 and 8 says, “Humankind can tame beef. They can contain birds, reptiles, and the creation in the sea, yet we cannot tame our own tongue.” The scripture says, “No man or woman can tame the tongue.” James goes on to describe the human tongue as an unruly evil that is full of deadly poison, but we use our tongues to create words. Since the beginning of creation, our lives have been shaped by words spoken to us, over us, at us, about us, words that are spoken and unspoken.
They shaped our childhood and our relationships. They buil, undermined, destroyed, and rebuilt marriages and relationships. Words spoken to us, at us, over us, have an impact, has impacted our confidence so much so that they determine to some extent, who we are actually we see in the mirror. Words do this to us.
How heavy were the words spoken to you? How heavy are the words you speak? Have you ever been crushed by someone’s words? If so, then you know exactly what I’m talking about because I believe that none of us are exempt or have been exempt. I believe we all have been injured or crushed in some way, some form or fashion by the words of other people.
Words carry weight. Words spoken and unspoken leave marks. They leave scars, but they can leave a mark for good, but they also leave marks for bad. Words build and destroy, discourage or inspire. Sometimes words wound our lives, mine included. We all know the extent of words and how they have impacted our lives in some form or fashion, even words that we didn’t hear, words that we want to hear.
Here’s the thing, we’re all quick to recognize not only the power of words but the power of words that other people say to us,and that they have over us. Here’s the caveat. We’re very slow to recognize or to admit the fact that our words, the words we speak, the words we speak to others, spoken and unspoken, have equal power in the lives of other people as well. Isn’t it easy to admit when we’ve been impacted by others? We can say that we can tell you when it happened, what they said, and how hurtful it was, but we don’t want to remember the exact words that we say or we said to other people, especially hurtful words, which cause harm.
When we do, we make excuses for what we said, Things such as, “That’s just who I am.” Really? “I’m just being honest. They’re just words. They don’t mean anything.” You and I know that can be nothing but the truth. Words have weight and they mean something. Consequently, we don’t want to be honest to the fact that we use our words irresponsibly.
We’ll say it’s not on purpose, but we’re irresponsible with our words because we just don’t understand or realize or want to realize or recognize or embrace the fact that words carry weight. Here’s another thing. Words are not equally weighted either. They carry weight, but they’re not equally weighted.
Our negative words weigh way more than positive words. The study has proven that in a sense. They took a study of relationships in marketplace and what they found was that if you say 1 negative word, you need to replace it with 5 to 9 positive words to counterbalance that negative word. I believe, like in a relationship, in an intimate relationship, a relationship with your kids, a relationship with your loved ones, with your parents, with your siblings, it’s not 5 to 9 words. It’s probably 25 to 30 positive words that you would have to use or say to counterbalance 1 negative word. Why? Words have weight. Negative words weigh way more than positive words.
The words that we use, the words that we feel that we need to say to people, strangers, as well as people that we know, the negative words that we’re saying will definitely make an impact on our loved ones. Let me say this as well. Another point is the source determines the weight. The source determines the weight of the word that we say.
When you’re in a conversation, even more so with people that we love and those who love us, we must remember who we are and who we represent in the conversation. The person on the other side, they’re listening and whatever it is that we’re saying to them, they’re going to feel it. That means that you got to think about, “Who am I? What do I represent to that person on the other side of me, that person that I’m talking to?”
What people hear and what they feel, regardless of what we think we’re saying, can and will do major damage, especially in the lives of others. When we get it wrong, we have to understand that our intent is irrelevant. Your words, my words, and our words carry weight and they are not equally weighted. They carry more weight than you and I even think, especially in relationships, specific relationships with our parents, family members, children, husband, wife, boss or best friends. Those people who are close to us, people we say we love, and who say they love us. The fact is, we know words have the potential to destroy, as well as build up and undermine, as well as inspire. Yet we choose to use them.
Words have the potential to destroy, as well as build up and undermine, as well as inspire. And yet we choose to use them. Share on XAll of us should take this into consideration because we all have been hurt in some way or another by the words of other people. We all must recognize that we must be good stewards and careful with our words because we’re human and we have feelings. Depending on who we are and who we’re talking to, some people’s feelings are easily hurt, so we have to be mindful of that.
What is the weight of our words doing to other people? What is the weight of your words doing to other people, especially those people who we claim we love? Are they leaving marks? Are they creating unforgettable wounds that will take years to heal? Are they building or destroying? What are the results of your words? What are they producing?
With all of that being said, now please allow me to introduce you to our phenomenal guest. I can’t wait for you to meet our guest. Every episode, I am so excited about our guests because I really believe they are amazing, phenomenal, awesome, all of the above. That’s who I believe they are. Our phenomenal guest is the Executive Producer of Nourish Creative, a story design studio and edit house dedicated to creating soulful human stories.
He is the former Creative Director of Jubilee, where he led the creative team to garner 1 billion-plus views and amassed more than 5 million-plus subscribers in under 3 years. He designed some of YouTube’s most viral and world-trending shows, such as Middle Ground, Spectrum, Odd Man Out, and more.
He is also the former Chief Creative of MINDSET at DIVE Studios, writing, producing, and directing for world-class celebrities such as Summer Walker, Eric Nam, 6LACK, Julia Michaels, Keshi, Huddy, Amine, Slowthai, DPR, among many more. He has written, directed, and edited work for 4,500 companies such as Apple, Nike, NASA, Zeiss, and more. His piece, Ode to the World Stories, won gold at the final national round of American Advertising Awards. That’s what I’m talking about.
Being an INFJ, Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling and Judging, avid reader, and resilient idealist, he is passionate about filmmaking that combines profound philosophical depth and radical entertainment. I told you he’s phenomenal. I haven’t even told you his name yet. Please help me to welcome Ien Chi. Thank you so much for being here.
Thank you for having me. What a pleasure.
I appreciate the grace Ien. Thank you so much for being here. I’m so excited you said yes. I’m always excited for all of our guests to that that comes on. Before we jump in, there are two things that I like to ask. One, please share with our audience how we met. This is amazing. Please share.
Long story short, I’ve been interacting with young people for the past couple of years. It started online when the pandemic started. My brother and I were reaching out to colleges and all sorts of young folks. I really like pouring into younger folks. My brother just happened upon your LinkedIn profile. On that profile, it said that you work with young folk. I think that’s what piqued his curiosity. My brother sent a cold email to you with a little bit of information about me, and then I think the email almost slipped through the cracks. You’re associate almost deleted it, but then you were like, “There’s something special about this email.”
You went to the bio page of my site and you saw some keywords like storytelling and profound and divinity and things like this. We got on a call and then just had a conversation about all sorts of things. We were talking about spirituality, energy, words like you said, and connecting on good vibes. I was like, “I have not met someone with so much energy. This is amazing.” The oozing authenticity and high vibes. I was like, “I like this human. I like this person.” That’s how we met.
Thank you, Ien, for saying because I get a lot of emails. I was going through my email and I was like, “You missed this one. We need to reach out to this person.” Eve was able to connect and we had a conversation just like you said, and it was off the chain. I said, “Please, you have to be on my show.” You said yes and I’m so grateful for that.
I’m so grateful as well. You got me pumped up. This is only the second time I’ve ever interacted with you, but it’s just like I get a shot of adrenaline. In the first five seconds of hearing your voice, it’s like, “All right, let’s go.”
Yes, let’s do it. I get that a lot. It’s my gift and I love to share it, so all good. Since the name of our show is You Are YOU, Unapologetically, please share with us what does it mean to you to be you unapologetically?
The first thing that came to my mind as you asked that question is you’re not second-guessing yourself. Your thoughts aren’t coming back towards your own mind. It’s focused outward. You are unhesitatingly just doing what you feel without hesitating and not worrying about the consequences of what people might think or what might happen and where things might go. It’s just not trying to strategize or be tactical, but you’re just literally expressing yourself on a moment-to-moment basis and seeing where it goes with freedom.
All that you just said was you are just being you. That’s what I tell people, “No one is better at being you than you.” You got it down. Sometimes people don’t realize that they got it. Who can do you better than you? Who? Please find somebody that can do you better than you and when you do, bring them to me, please. No one has brought anyone to me as of yet. I’m still standing my ground on that and saying, “No one can do you better than you.” Thank you so much for that. The weight of words is what we’re talking about. We all have been impacted by words. I would like you to share with me what words were said to you that helped shape you into who you are now.
There are so many words that helped shape me, but the first thing that comes to mind is when I was a little kid, all the time, my dad would tell me, “Ien, you’re going to grow up to do incredible great things.” He would always be extremely affirming of whatever it is I wanted to do. I’m very similar to my dad and he knows that I’m similar to him.
We’re both very artistic, we’re deep, we love introspective conversations, and we’re very spiritual. When he started to see me going down this path of art and trying to make meaningful things and trying to speak to people at a deeper level, he even told me like, “Ien, you’re me 2.0. You’re going to do even greater things than me.”
He is a preacher. He’d tell me like, “I preach in front of maybe a couple of hundred people, but your films, they’re going to speak to millions of people. So many people are going to see them.” I heard that since I was young. At the time, I don’t think I really appreciated it as much as I do now because it really gave me wind in my sails too. I had a sense that I was destined for great things. I remember when I was a kid, I’d go around and be like, “I’m a genius.” Just really a childlike, pure awe-striking way of like, “I’m in this universe and I can do anything I want.” I think that had a huge impact on me.
Throughout the years, just people who had the integrity and the courage to heart-to-heart share anything that affirmed my true self was just continual good fuel along the way, teachers, friends, mentors. Also, people, I don’t know that I people whose interviews I see online or movies or dialogues from a scene. Things like this that I’d pick up.
I’m sorry for cutting you off, but I want you to go into sharing some of the actual words, some of the things that were said to your dad that impact you, and how you feel about yourself right now. We know of the teacher, your dad, and what you said about your dad, but what are some of the actual things that were said to you?
I think everyone is unique for sure, but somehow there are some areas of my life where I feel like I’m a real black sheep. I don’t do things the normal way. Words that I’ve affirmed that where it’s like what usually might seem like a not good thing to people, but someone says like, “I freaking love how introspective and creative you are,” because the bad side of that is like, “You’re so in your head all the time. You’re stuck in your imagination.” On the flip side of that, they see, “You have such a vivid imagination. You have such a rich inner world. You have so much creativity in you.” They see the potential of how that can be expressed and shared with the world. I think that has really lifted me up.
Just like we’re talking about words have weight, share with us words that impact you or situational or incident that occurred that caused you to shut down and not be yourself.
I remember there was one instance where I was leading a team and there was a little presentation I was giving of my vision for what we had to do to get to making some amazing work and making an impact. In the middle of the presentation, somebody interrupted me and pretty much said how useless this was. I didn’t get to quite finish my thought and it was in front of other people too. Especially because I wasn’t expecting that. I think I was caught off guard and I didn’t really know what to do. I felt very embarrassed. I felt like saving face, the opposite of that. This guy pointed out something that it just felt like he poked at the soft white underbelly and then everyone saw it too.
You felt like you were exposed.
I felt like I lost the respect of a lot of the folks who were in that same meeting. After that, it just marked a point for me where it made me not feel safe to be able to open up and share my vision. I would say that was one instance.
Just like in the intro, I was saying, we all have been crushed. Let me ask you this, what are some of the words that you have said that inflict pain, that inflict hurt? I know I have some, so share with us a time or incident that you actually used your words to do that.
There was an emotional intelligence workshop that I did some years ago, maybe like in 2015, 2016. One of the exercises they taught us was direct feedback to someone of what is not working about how they show up. I got a real high from that experience because I thought I got some real gold and good feedback from other people and I wanted to take this out into the real world. Except the problem in the real world is that people haven’t done this workshop. They don’t have the same context. I started showing up and with some friends, I started being absolutely uncensored about my words and giving them feedback without giving them the context first of why I was doing that and what was coming.
Good feedback, I think, has to be introduced with clarity that I’m going to say this because I love you and I also want to have your permission to say this. I’m not just going to just drop it on you out of nowhere. I wasn’t quite mature enough at the time to do that. There was some collateral damage. I remember one more thing about good feedback that good feedback should only be helpful. It shouldn’t be things like, “I don’t like the color of your hat.”
To give good feedback, introduce it with the clarity that 'I will say this because I love you.' Share on XIf a person wants to wear this hat, what is that to me? Why should I care about that? Why am I burdening them with my own personal preference of style? That’s them, that’s not my territory, but I crossed that line a few times where I told people my unfiltered opinion about how they look and my opinion about how they show up. I wasn’t really taking into consideration their own just preference of style.
As you said, unfiltered, uncensored, and just going out. Now let me ask you. In that, did you make an excuse? You weren’t sensitive at all, but knowing that, what did you do? Did you make an excuse or did you just drop it and you kept it moving?
At the time, to some people, I explained the context of like, “I just learned about this feedback thing, so let’s do this.” I was forcing them into this feedback exercise and then other times just throwing it out on the table and seeing where it goes. The most damaging ones were probably like when I forced the feedback on people when it was random and people didn’t know that they had a whole train coming at them. I would say these unfiltered things that uncalled for.
Can you share with us what that unfiltered thing is or a couple of them? I want our audience to know what is being said and what we are saying so that they can connect and be like, “I said that too.”
I have one clear example. I was meeting up with a female friend. I regret it to this day, but it’s a lesson I learned. I just straight up told her, “I don’t think you’re attractive.” Attraction is a subjective thing. Someone can’t really change the way they look. That’s not up to them. It’s an extremely selfish thing to say. It’s just not respectful.
Let me just be point blank. You called her ugly in a sophisticated way.
Pretty much.
It was sophisticated and so it landed on her as if you said the same thing. You just sophisticated it in so many words. Thank you so much for sharing that. There are times when I’ve said things in the introductory episode of The Weight of Your Words, I talked about my goddaughter and how I went in on her so bad that my husband had to hold me back. I was at the point where I was like, “What?” This was my goddaughter, so for her, she was devastated. However, at that point in time, did I care? No. It was only after I started doing work and investing in me that it raised its head.
I knew the situation was there. I tried to sweep it up underneath a rug and avoid it, but it kept showing its face. The more I did work on me, the more it showed itself and I literally had to address it and face it. It was five years that we had no relationship. Initially, I was like, “I really don’t care.” Once I start working on me and start seeing me and how I showed up then and start checking in with, “Who are you and who are you representing?” I literally had to go back and have that conversation and this is what it did. Of course, I asked her to forgive me and I gave her the space.
For me, it wasn’t like, “Forgive me. Now everything is over.” It’s not over. You have to give people the space and grace to heal as well. When she was ready, she invited me in and it wasn’t like, “I’m ready to talk to you.” It was just us having a conversation and I would say she called me more in the last year than she called me, of course, in the last five years. I’m grateful for that.
There are things that we say, and this is the discussion that I want to have, is what we say to people. How do we lead them? How do we lead people after we meet them? Total strangers. Do we leave them wishing they never met us? I just wanted to share that there are some unspoken words that we also have that impact our lives that we never heard before or that we wish our parents would’ve said.
I’m from a single-parent home and my mom would always say, “I’m proud of you,” but I also realize that for me, I’m the fifth child of eight children, and I’m loud. My mom would always say, “You’re so loud,” or things that for me, my mom never really pushed us to do things. For example, in our growing up in our house, we had to believe in God, but we did not worship.
My mother didn’t force that on us or push us to. There are some things that she didn’t say that I wish she would’ve said for us to learn more about God. Also, in our studies, I really didn’t start doing good in school until I became a college student. When I realized that it costs, it’s not free. To push me in that way was like some unspoken words that I wish my mother would’ve said to me. What about you? Are there any unspoken words that you wish you would’ve heard?
I was just thinking that on the flip side of the feedback, the way I did it when I was ruthless about shooting people in the face with feedback, I do wish I got more feedback from people in a kind way. A lot of times, like in situations, I’d be confused or don’t have experience with a situation or something like that. I wish there were more ways where people could have honest conversations about, “This is how you showed up. I know you meant this, but this would’ve probably been a better way. I think you could work on this.” There’s actually a quote that I really like. “Good friends stab you in the front.”
I have not heard that one, but I love that.
It’s a great quote. I think we could learn more effective ways of stabbing each other in front in a kind way because there are things we can’t see about ourselves. We are who we are and our version of reality, a lot of it is what is what has been given us when we’re younger. It’s not until we hear that kind feedback from someone who is wise or cares about us or just has a different perspective that it opens up to new possibilities. In my case, to get a little more nitty gritty and specific, I’ve always been very creative and very imaginative and very introspective. That gives me a lot of strength when it comes to my creative work and filming and editing and doing all these ideation.
Whenever I’m in a room full of people and we’re all coming up with ideas, I come up with the most ideas always. That’s just how it’s been. The flip side of that is that when I’m having conversations with people and they say one thing, my head will go all over the place and think of this and that. I didn’t realize this before, but people didn’t feel heard or seen by me because I’m in my own imagination.
They’re sparking these ideas and I’m looking over here or doing this thing and they’re trying to talk to me. They’re trying to see that I see them and I’m not giving them that recognition. I feel like I ran into a little bit of tension here and there because of that. It’s not that I didn’t like people, it’s just that my natural way of being is very internal. I’m an ideas guy. I’m not naturally a people guy. I’m more about ideas.
You did say introvert.
That’s an example where there were some misunderstandings when I was younger, but I’ve gotten much better at being present. Also, I asked some of my real good friends, and they’ve stabbed me in the front and say like, “In this situation, don’t walk ahead faster than I do. Let’s walk at my speed. You’re over there doing in your own head, doing your own thing. You can look at where I’m at and go my speed.” I really appreciate the friend who said that.
I’ve constantly gone to him now and I’ve said that, “Thank you so much for pointing this out. It helped in this area.” He’s my go-to guy because he naturally cares a lot about people. He knows how to do this thing. He’s become a sounding board. It’s a way to get close to people, too when you stab each other in the front. You learn to find sounding boards. This guy is so much better than me at this, so I’m going to go to him and talk to him about these things in my life.
I love the stab your friends in the front. Let me ask you this real quick. Are there any unspoken words that you need to say?
I’m thinking about especially creative work when there’s like feedback given for an edit or notes on a script. I think I can narrow in right away on what needs to be fixed. I can have some context of, “Take this or leave it. At the end of the day, you should make the decision, but here’s what I think.” Sometimes I can jump that hurdle and just go to what I think. The piece might not even be mine.
It’s not my piece or just making sure that this person knows I care about them and like, “Let’s look at this piece together and I’m going to be honest about my thoughts.” They’re just thoughts. They’re not things that you have to take as rules. Just slowing down and providing that context is something I could do better. Providing that before we go into this, let’s set the lighting so we understand why we’re talking about this in the first place. I can set that context before bringing out the feedback.
I definitely would love for you to share how people can get in contact with you. Before we do that, I wanted to ask you, how do you manage your tongue and your words?
I read Gandhi’s autobiography and what struck me is that he said he’s very careful with his words. He considers it very carefully before what he says what he says. If you talk all the time too much, it doesn’t have as much weight. That stuck with me. I think I’ve been working on that a little bit. It’s the opposite of my older feedback days. Everything that comes up, filter what’s helpful, and then let’s present what has value for people. Not just what’s valuable to me but what’s valuable to this person and what makes sense.
Thank you so much. I just want to share one of the things that I do, especially when you have a hard conversation. You know it’s hard and you don’t have a lot of background on that person, but you have to have this hard conversation, even with those that you do know. You have the background of that person. I always say it’s always better to go in with two accolades. Don’t fluff it up. Think of that person and think of what is it that you like, appreciate, admire, some might be loved about that person.
You tell that person. “What I really like about you, I like when I’m talking, you’ll pause and you’ll stop and you’ll be present with me. What I appreciate is that you are always caring. What I admire about you is that you’re determined. When you set your mind up to do something, you really get it done. I need some support. Here’s how you can support me. When you say or when you do, can you think of me in this way?”
Just that way is how I teach and I share, and I do it myself when I want to get into that hard conversation. I don’t want that person to feel like, “That was horrible. Why did she say that?” I go in with true accolades, I want them to feel my truth, but I want them to feel that I’m genuine. I want them to feel that I appreciate them. When I do share with them how they can support me, it’s a softer blow because what they’re going to hear more is what I said that inspired them, that encouraged them, that empowered them. We then can have a conversation about what I’m struggling with or what I need support with.
I just wanted to share that as well. Now please share with our audience how they can get in contact with you. Is there any way that they can reach out to you? After you do that, please give a closing remark on our topic, The Weight of Your Words, so that our audience can take that piece of juiciness and use it and chew on it or walk with it, whatever they choose to do with it. Please, how can they get in contact with you and some closing remarks or takeaways?
The best way to reach me is probably Instagram. My handle is @IenTheKorean, or you can sign up for my email list on my website, IenChi.com. That’s where I have all my work. You can check out all the stuff I’ve worked on there and there’s an email list. Last juicy words. I was talking with a friend about loving our shadow, the parts of us that we want to run away from and don’t like.
When we’re able to look at the parts of ourselves that we think are imperfect, whether it’s ego or greed or what have you, when you can look at it without judging it as good or bad, I think it becomes a lot easier to look at other people without that judgment as well. That’s something I’ve been reflecting on, shedding that light. It has to start with what’s within yourself, and then you can share that with others. It’s impossible to share that light with others unless you’ve illuminated what’s within you.
It's impossible to share the light with others unless you illuminate what's within you. Share on XThank you so much for that. I truly appreciate it. Ien, you are the bomb. You’re the best. Just like we said when we had a call, we just clicked in our conversation as if we knew each other for years. Once that occurred, it was like, “You have to come on my show.” I was just so grateful that you said yes. Thank you again and again for saying yes and for coming on and sharing your wisdom because that’s what you shared.
You shared your wisdom from your perspective. I’m quite sure there are thousands of people who you totally connect with because of who you are, and they align themselves with you. I’m so grateful for that. Thank you again and I look forward to having you back on when we change our topic to another topic. Thank you, Ien. I appreciate you.
Thank you, Kim. Thank you so much. To everyone reading, grace and peace, and good vibes. May we continue being ourselves and unfolding more of our true selves.
Unapologetically, that’s what I’m talking about. Thanks again.
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Here’s the question that I have for you. How many words would you say that you’re away from totally ruining someone else’s life? How many words would you say that you are away from wrecking another person’s life with your words, your tongue? We know it’s easy, if you are not mindful, that words, our words, carry weight, and they are not equally weighted. The source of the word determines the weight of the word. Remember that when you’re speaking to someone, you have the ability to speak life into them. You have the ability to empower them.
Don’t waste that opportunity by degrading them or causing them to feel less than they should. Empower them. Remember, our words have weight. No if, ands, buts about it. They weigh. Negative words weigh way more than positive words. You want to use positive words and not negative words. The source determines the weight. If you are a parent and you’re talking to your child, that’s some heavy words. It’s easy to lose yourself in class and ideas, conflicting beliefs, and the flood of information that overwhelms us every day.
With society’s rigid expectations and endless opinions, self-expression and self-appreciation can feel challenging and daunting. Most of the time, what you’re going to do, what we do is push it away. We dumb down, we act as if nothing’s happening and we just go with the flow. I want you to know. you are you, unapologetically.
That means being true to you, being true to how you were created, and not allowing people’s opinions affect how you show up in life, affect how you show up in the world. Every day people are going to talk, so let them talk. You have no time, none whatsoever, to be intimidated by the presence of others and think little of yourself. You don’t have time for that.
When you show up without pretense and hesitation, come on now. I’m just saying the world can’t sell your glamor. Most importantly, you will be inspired to shine your light so brightly that you will share it and help others to tap into their own brilliance. Let’s put an end to this disparaging mindset and begin to own our authentic selves.
Join me here again, in the safe space where I’m going to initiate an influential conversation about you being you. You are you, unapologetically. Absolutely no one is better at being you than you. Thank you for being here. I really appreciate it and appreciate the support. Talk with you next time. Take care.
Important Links
- Nourish Creative
- Ien Chi
- @IenTheKorean – Instagram
About Ien Chi
Ien Chi is a TEDx speaker and the former Creative Director of Jubilee (8M+ subscribers). Most recently he was the